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Starting your own half project (adults only)
Posted by Joan King Salwen on 02.22.2010Share
A common question comes up each time we discuss our Power of Half project: As we talk about what happened to our family during the project -- the knowledge we gained about each other or the trust that grew among us -– people begin to wonder how they could build those deeper connections for themselves. 

Everybody seems to have a group they would like to grow closer with.  For some, the group includes their children or their grandchildren.  For others, it’s their adult brothers and sisters.  For others, it’s their dorm or sorority, their investment club, their Sunday School class.  Whatever the group, our audiences want to know how they can get started on a journey that builds a common purpose and the connectedness that comes with it.

How you get started depends a lot on where you’re starting from and what your role is in your family, community or group.  We’ve written three posts that sketch a process for beginning a Half project depending on your starting point.  We'll post the other two in the next several days, but let's start with:

 

 

If you’re an adult wanting to create meaning with siblings or within another adult community...

Of the three scenarios laid out here, this one requires the most courage.  An adult who wants to change a relationship dynamic with other adults is challenging perhaps decades of history in the way the family or group has operated.  The catalyst for a Half project with other adults will be inviting others to open up, share one’s values, learn together, and change the way the group views their resources.  I don’t know about you, but I don’t see a lot of adults embracing the practices of opening up, sharing values, learning and changing, especially when the impulse to do so comes from a sibling or a peer.


The book The Power of Half can be helpful in getting the discussion started, so a first step in a journey of this nature is to the read The Power of Half yourself.  Have a pen handy while you read, and mark passages that speak to you.  Make meaningful notes in the margins about connections you draw while reading.  While Kevin’s writing tells the story of our family, Hannah’s contributions include “how-tos” for people wanting to start their own Half, so read those with interest and openness.  


As you read the book, consider who within your group might be most open to the idea of a Half project.  When you finish the book, share your copy with that person, notes and all.  Be forthright about your purpose. You might try something like this: “My relationship with you (and so-and-so and so-and-so …) is very important to me, and I thought about the possibilities for our relationship often when I read this book.  I hope you enjoy it.  Let me know what you think once you've read it.”  

When the most open family or community member has read the book, sit down for coffee to share reactions.  If that member of your group is interested in growing closer by taking on a Half project together, you can discuss how to get the other members on board.

From there, you can begin choosing activities from the book to build momentum (the sections named "Hannah's Take"), such as Believing You Can Make a Difference and Realizing How Much You Have.

Good luck on your journey.
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